a PUNKED princess

Today I celebrate my 1st year in Dubai which also mean, it's our Papang's 1st year since his passing...

I still clearly remember the morning of Feb 7th, I was doing some last minute packing, checking my little notebook on things I still need to do. At 9 o'clock, the usual time papsie and +Papang+ leaves home to go their office, my mom called me from downstairs asking me to play the piano for Papang. I told her, "yeah! it's in my notebook" It's written there that I want to play before they leave

I played the usual pieces: Bato sa Buahangin, Maalala Mo Kaya (his favorite), Dahil Sa'Yo, Kastilyong Buhangin, Minamahal Kita and lastly, Ngayon at Kailanman (my favorite).

While I was just starting to play, I saw Papang going down the stairs in his office barong with the helped of our long time maid. It aches my heart seeing him go down the stairs twice as long as he usually does. He already had several instances where he couldn't breathe prior to this day and some parts of his body is swollen so he's really gone weak now.

Then he sat behind me, listening while I play (I can feel him listening). By the last song, my tears are now running down fast in my cheeks. Lots of thoughts running in my head: will this be my last time to play for him? will he still be here when i come back? if he is here, will he be weaker than he is now? Then all memories of how he used to play with us, buy us things when we were young all crossed my mind which made me cry harder. I hardly see the music piece anymore.

Just to show you photo of my and Papang during my college graduation:

When they were about to leave the house, I told him that I'm leaving that night (he already know about it but I still said it), I said my quiet "i love you" to him, my sincere thank you and gave him a soft kiss on his left cheek thinking that it may be the last.

At 6:40 p.m., I remember the plane taking off with the engine growing louder and louder I held in my seats and closed my eyes as I'm very scared of heights. Then I had this very strong emotion....I thought this may be how dying feels like...very loud, very strong, very rough then as soon as the plane tires lift off the ground, you feel at peace, relaxed and free.

Reaching Singapore and waiting for my connecting flight to Dubai, I called papsie to tell him I already reached there. He quickly passed the phone to mamsie. Mamsie keeps telling me: "o ingat ka beh ha, lagi ka pray. lagi ka pray. lagi ka pray"

Then I found out after several days that our dear +Papang+ is at peace the same day I left...the same time the plane took off...

The time when I call papsie and mamsie the funeral service was just taking out Papang's remains from the hospital.

I really wish I'll be given one more chance to talk to him to tell him my achievements, that i'm doing fine here in Dubai, how much I miss him and that I'll always play his favorite kundiman in our old piano...

P.S. My sister ardey told me that our old time maid saw +Papang+ with tears in his eyes while I was playing the piano...